True devotion in relationships is extraordinary.
Not of the nature which wants to cover up faults or uphold evil or fan the flames of falsity.
Rather, that which is true and beautiful and genuine.
Heart-sharing vulnerability.
Coming with open hands, carrying not agenda.
I read a story once about a little girl who was her Daddy’s shadow. She brought him his slippers. She showered him with kisses. She made him laugh and counted ice cubes carefully for his iced tea. He always took time for her. Stooping down, he would point out interesting rocks or a butterfly sunning on a marigold. He made sure she knew he enjoyed her company. One day he asked her, with a bit of a twinkle in his eye, “Honeybunch, why do you love me?” Without a moment’s hesitation, the curly head turned up with earnest delight. “Oh, Daddy, how could I not love you? You’re so very good and good and goodest to me.”
True and beautiful and kind.
Holding one another in high esteem.
Outdoing ourselves in showing honor.
Some call it Kindred spirits. Or Company girl.
Some scrawl BFF. Heart friends or compadres.
Confidantes.
These are not instantaneous relationships. They are forged through time and conversation, offering bits and pieces of ourselves. We watch, without knowing, to see how each piece is received and fitted together. We become sure of each other.
These are not often relationships. By this I mean, they are rare. Our souls long for this friendship; it is not known by all, nor can it be forced.
A being seen and known and understood and loved despite all our flaws and messy hair and lack of athletic skills and forgetfulness and perchance for rambling.
A loving deeply and devotedly with heartfelt commitment despite misunderstandings and busyness and faltering and weariness and anxiety.
This devotion tenderly cultivates a soul-safe place. Encouragement blooms. Tendrils of inspiration vine their way in and around and over, edging it in splendor. Acknowledgment of need, of becoming, of works-in-progress, are set side by side with affirmations, assurances, and delight, creating a stone solid foundation.
Seldom does this happen with large numbers of people. We may have one or two or three deeply vulnerable friendships in our lives, but we find magnificent gratitude if we have even one.
Sometimes we wait years to find the friend we always wanted.
Sometimes we meet in grade school.
Sometimes our built-in friend comes as our sister or brother.
My Book Club Society has been reading through The Lord of the Rings series.
As I flipped through The Two Towers, I found myself drawn to two very different characters.
So different, but similar.
Both bringing:
Devotion and companionship.
Friendship and loyalty.
Trust and dependability.
One a Hobbit named Sam.
And the other a gallant steed
bearing the name Shadowfax.
Tolkien casts characters who create deep and long relationships.
Who form bonds.
Who journey together.
Some grew up together. Paths crossed for others.
And while numerous friendships of a lesser nature cross all through the pages, the very deepest of devotion shows up one-on-one.
I believe this is a nod in part to real-life living, because our true humanness limits our bandwidth of time and energy and commitment.
We cannot deeply travel beside one hundred people and do it well.
Here we find Sam ~
“Sam said nothing. The look on Frodo’s face was enough for him. He knew that words of his were useless. And after all he never had any real hope in the affair from the beginning; but being a cheerful hobbit he had not needed hope, as long as despair could be postponed. Now they were come to the bitter end. But he had stuck to his master all the way; that was what he had chiefly come for, and he would still stick to him. His master would not go to Mordor alone. Sam would go with him.” ~ The Two Towers
Sam traveled beside Frodo. Sam knew his purpose. He didn’t become distracted or run off in a dither trying to help everyone they met along the way. Hardships didn’t defeat his devotion. What he had chiefly come for was his guiding compass.
And as for Shadowfax, well, he may run wild, shy away from every other one who attempts to corral him. But let Gandalf whistle, give a signal, beckon, and Shadowfax appears in an instant offering steadfast service to the need.
“There is another that strides ahead,” said Legolas. “A very great horse! I have not seen his like before.”
‘Nor will you again,’ said Gandalf. ‘That is Shadowfax. He is the chief of Mearas, lords of horses, and not even Theoden, King of Rohan, has ever looked on a better. Does he not shine like silver, and run as smoothly as a swift stream? He has come for me: the horse of the White Rider. We are going to battle together.’
Even as the old wizard spoke, the great horse came striding up the slope towards them; his coat was glistening and his mane flowing in the wind of his speed. The two others followed, now far behind. As soon as Shadowfax saw Gandalf, he checked his pace and whinnied loudly; then trotting gently forward he stooped his proud neck and nuzzled his great nostrils against the old man’s neck.” ~ The Two Towers, pg 493
And while I love all that Shadowfax supplies Gandalf with and who can’t be compelled by the quiet resolute assurance Sam brings to Frodo, and I’m eternally grateful for friends who have graced my life with genuine kindness and truth and compassion, I was struck by this.
For every Sam to Frodo, Diana to Anne, Barney to Andy, Steve to Eddie, Jane to Lizzie, Ole Dan to Little Ann, Anna to Elsa, Melanie to Gully, Tacy to Betsy, Ruthie to Kit, Angela to Jenna, there is Valancy and Belle and Girl of the Limberlost and Mary Grantham and Kristen and Jane who have lived years of their lives longing for a kindred spirit.
Life does not always play out happily ever after.
Laying the book on my nightstand, I thought of the true comfort the devotion in these relationships pointed to.
Whether we have the friend we long for, the friend here for the long haul in our embodied actual lives, or whether we don’t yet, here’s the beautiful truth.
_____________ to ____________.
Fill in the blanks.
In the second one write your name.
In the first one, Jesus.
Jesus to Deborah
Sam to Frodo
Shadowfax to Gandalf
Jesus to You, friend.
“It’s not the LEVEL of our faith, but the OBJECT of our faith.” James Bryan Smith says {emphasis mine}
While we do speak of levels of friendships or relationships, the greater truth is not in the level but the object, the person, the God we gift our devotion to. When we deeply love, when we deeply attach, when we focus on, there is no need to rate the level of our devotion.
As we spend time with God, as we pray, as we live faith on the days we don’t feel it at all, we are deepening our attachment, our relationship, our chief reason in our journey.
I read that Leif Peterson said of his father “He had only one sermon, one message.”
Everything he taught and wrote and preached would always point in the same direction. Condensed to four simple sentences, this is the power of a beautiful true devotion.
“God loves you. He’s on your side.
He’s coming after you. He’s relentless.”
~ Eugene Peterson
How can we not respond to this genuine devoted pursuit?
Oh, Daddy you’re so very good and good and goodest to me.
Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2022