Β Today, my friend Darby Dugger is guest posting and bringing us some words promoting marriage! I’m so excited to have her here, sharing with us. Thank-you, Darby!
One of my very first giveaways, over here in this post, was the book she authored, titled For The Love Of Our Husbands. You can peek at the book in my giveaway post or click on the book title to go look at it on Darby’s site and purchase one for yourself and one to gift a friend!
{ALSO! Secret………..Stay tuned……….come back next week because I’m going to be giving away another one of her books!! Hooray! Cartwheels and stuff like that!}
I love Darby’s heart for her husband and for marriage. She shares struggles she faces and mistakes she {we all} make. She may write about her mistakes, but we do all have them. They may not be identical, but we all deal with bumps and regrets and bad days in our relationships. That’s why commitment and keeping on keeping on are great tools for our marriages.
Darby also promotes praise for her husband and prayer for her husband and marriage. She encouragesΒ women to praise and cheerlead their own husbands and she rejoices in the good things marriage brings.
So, dear ladies, here are her words!!!
The Number One Cause of Divorce
Β
Fill in the blank: The number one cause of divorce is:___________. Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β .
Perhaps like me, you filled in the blank with a specific answer such as finances, infidelity, or death of a child. In a world where divorce is common, I have always assumed that there was a particular situation that landed the two people who pledged a life-long love in a courtroom to legally dissolve their agreement. Perhaps I didn’t assume it as much as wanted to believe that it was one event, one instance that made the individuals renege. Surely something horrific and specific took place in their lives, and as long as I steer clear from their situation, our marriage is safe.
Recently I heard a statistic that sent chills down my spine. New research shows that the number one cause of divorce is selfishness. When I first heard those words, I felt as if I had been sucker punched. After inwardly debating my beliefs, I can’t deny the realization of his statement. The scary reality is that I am a very selfish person! It is hard for me to steer clear from this leading cause of divorce! My husband and I have always said that divorce is never an option, but I shouldn’t be so arrogant to assume that we are immune.
The easy thing to do would be to ignore the statistic and rest in the fact that divorce is a curse word to us. That seems easy enough, but it ignores reality. After decades of putting myself first, even if my marriage is still intact, I dare to say it won’t be thriving. I will exhaust my husband and constantly seek fulfillment outside of our marriage if I elevate my personal happiness. Today the easy choice is to continue down a road of selfishness, but I don’t recall many times in Scripture where Jesus encourages his followers to take the easy road. Instead, he tells them to take up their cross and follow him daily.
Picking up my cross of selflessness will take work, frustration, and even agony. I won’t get my way every time. I will not win every argument. I will lose my right to be right. Our date nights won’t revolve around my interests, and I won’t always get to choose the radio station. In the middle of the night, I will no longer act asleep while I wait for my husband to hear the screaming child. Sex won’t revolve around my desires (or is timeline a better word?). Following after Christ means that I submit to my husband and fight my flesh on matters big and small. I can’t follow in Christ’s footsteps and hold onto pride, lust, discontentment, and greed. Those self-motivated thoughts are seeds for divorce! I should never be so presumptuous as to assume that my selfishness doesn’t affect my marriage because the truth is, it could be the very thing that leads to the end of my marriage.
Will you join me in battling selfishness every day?Β
Thanks again, to Darby!
For some other marriage reads, hop over here to my marriage category ~
Click over here to read this post, Passionate About Marriage, and be inspired with little, unselfish acts of kindnessΒ we can do for our husbands. What are some little ways and things you do to say, “I love you and you matter!”?
2 thoughts on “The Number One Cause of Divorce”
Comments are closed.